Ward and June are planning on going to the moves even though Ward is tired. As Ward is waiting for June to dress Beaver comes down and says needs help with a poem due tomorrow that was assigned three weeks ago. June is ready to go but Beaver's poem has ended the movies. Beaver decides the poem should be about bears. Ward writes out the first line of "Beaver's Poem," reading "I would like to be a bear." Beaver is off getting a glass of water and June warns Ward not to write the poem for Beaver.
June goes upstairs and Wally asks her when will dad start yelling at Beaver. June says that their father does not yell. But when she opens the door, she hears Ward yelling, "PAY ATTENTION, ETC." Ward has had it. Ward is tired and now is frustrated. He sends Beaver upstairs, and before he knows it, he has written the entire poem.
At breakfast, Beaver reads "his" poem but June is upset as she recognizes Ward's hand at work, but then starts laughing at the content to tease Ward. When Wally comes home from school he has news. Wally tells June that she and dad are expected to be at Beaver's school for an assembly. Oh, and Beaver won a prize for "his" poem and will be reading it aloud at the assembly. June can hardly wait to tell Ward about Beaver's success.
June wants Ward to talk to Beaver and tell him that he can't accept a prize for his father's work. Larry Mondello is up in Beaver's room playing and not trading marbles. Ward tells Larry to close the door on his way out. Larry's face tells us he knows something is wrong.
Ward tells Beaver that he can't accept the prize. Beaver insists he wrote the poem, and Ward is having a tough time getting Beaver to accept the truth. Beaver's solution is not to go to school ever again, and then he locks himself in the bathroom. Wally comes into the room and tells Beaver to come out of the bathroom. When Wally sees Beaver has been crying he asks, did dad hit you, no. did dad yell at you, no; then why are you crying.
It's Saturday, Ward has gone to see Mrs. Rayburn and explain the situation. The poem sounds like a third grader wrote it and Mrs. Rayburn finds it thoughtful. "I would like to be a bear / Gay and happy, free from care. / That's the life like no other/ climbing trees with my mother. /Though they call me beast with dreadful rage / I've never locked things in a cage / or set a trap from time's begun / or shot at humans with a gun.
Ward says he fashioned the poem about how he believes Beaver feels about animals. Mrs. Rayburn suggests Beaver take the weekend to allow Beaver time to write his own poem. And she lets Ward off the hook for helping Beaver by saying some parents don't help at all.
Beaver has his poem ready. Oncet I wished I was a duck / cause mostly ducks have lots of luck /they swim around all day in a pool / and mostly never have to go to school. / Then I saw a duck hanging in the butcher store / and I didn't want to be a duck no more.
Wally wants to know if Beaver thinks he will win a prize again. Beaver thinks he will because he was the only kid in the third grade who wrote a poem.
The stories I could tell about parents "helping" their kids by doing their work for them. I always liked the irate father who was angry his son got an F after his secretary wrote and typed the paper for his son. Unfortunately, she completely failed to use the MLA style sheet. He was really going to yell at his secretary when he saw her next. I suspect he missed the entire point of education period.
And Tony Dow did have a growth spurt between season one and two; he is almost as tall as Hugh Beaumont.
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