After receiving a considerable donation of money, Springfield builds a monorail system with Homer as the conductor, unaware they've just boarded a one-way train to Hell.
After Homer loses his license for DUI, Marge pressures him to give up beer for a month; Lisa attempts to prove that Bart is less intelligent than a hamster.
Bart and Lisa convince Grampa to let them use his name for episodes of "Itchy and Scratchy" they have written; Homer re-takes a test he failed in high school.
Marge home-schools Bart after he is expelled from Springfield Elementary; Lisa protests a barbaric local holiday centered around clubbing snakes to death.
When Krusty's show is canceled after losing viewers to a ventriloquist and his dummy, Bart and Lisa organize a celebrity-filled comeback special for their favorite clown.
After the kids find a record with Homer's picture on it, he recalls the story of how he achieved fame in the 1980s with his barbershop quartet, The Be Sharps.
After his birthday party goes wrong, Mr. Burns begins to want his childhood toy, a teddy bear named Bobo; Homer finds that Maggie is in possession of the doll.
Homer sells his soul to the Devil for a donut, Bart contends with a gremlin on the side of the school bus which only he can see, and the family discovers that Mr. Burns is a vampire.
After joining the Junior Campers while on a sugar high, Bart reluctantly invites Homer to accompany him on the group's annual father-son rafting trip, which soon goes awry.