Review of Zombie 3

Zombie 3 (1988)
5/10
Insane zombie nonsense from Fulci, Mattei and Fragasso.
19 August 2010
From the word go, Zombie Flesheaters 2 (AKA Zombi 3) makes very little sense, but thankfully it's one of those trashy 80s Euro horrors that is so shoddy in virtually every department that one cannot fail to have some fun with it.

Just one look at the film's pedigree is enough to give a pretty good idea of how crap (and therefore how enjoyable) this film actually is: Lucio Fulci, fast approaching his end-of-career worst, directed some of the action before a stroke forced him to hand over the reins to Bruno 'Hell of the Living Dead' Mattei; actor turned TV director Deran Sarafian leads the incredible no-star cast; and Claudio Fragasso, the man responsible for Troll 2 (considered by many to be the worst horror film ever made), provided the derivative, nonsensical plot that gleefully rips off a variety of zombie/infection classics, including Romero's The Crazies and Dan O' Bannon's Return Of The Living Dead.

The cause of the zombie plague in Zombi Flesheaters 2 is a top secret genetically engineered virus called Death One, which is accidentally introduced into the atmosphere after a victim is cremated (on the orders of a contemptuous general, who ignores warnings from concerned army boffins, accusing them of "talking science fiction!"). Pretty soon, the area is not only crawling with flesh hungry reanimated corpses, but also squads of haz-mat suited soldiers who have orders to contain the virus by any means necessary—which isn't exactly great news for the small group of survivors trapped inside the contaminated zone (which, within a single day, has become inexplicably derelict and overgrown with vines!).

Lacking any sense of logic, the film stumbles awkwardly from one daft scene to another in a shambolic manner that makes its mouldy walking corpses seem positively well coordinated in comparison. For connoisseurs of extremely trashy horror, this can only be good news, with the complete absence of rationale resulting in some mind-bogglingly bonkers moments: zombie birds attack a bus full of babes; a severed zombie head, shrouded in an eerie green light and smoke, flies from inside a fridge to chow down on a man's throat; a survivor discovers a box full of weapons in an abandoned building ("I found a crate full of guns downstairs," he casually declares); a lady is attacked by an unborn zombie baby that tears its way from its mother's womb; and a hand grenade, conveniently found under a truck, not only knocks down several of the undead but also destroys an entire building!

Factor in some truly awful acting, unconvincing gore, dreadful direction, zombies that can talk, jump, fight, and use weapons, and a jive-talking radio DJ who joins the ranks of the living dead, but still carries on hosting his show, and what you have is one hell of a mess—but one that really needs to be seen to be believed.

It doesn't really deserve it, but I'll give Zombie Flesheaters 2 a rating of 5/10 just for being a genuine one-of-a-kind experience.
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