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ginglederf
Reviews
It Lives in the Attic (2016)
Confusing and Hard To Watch. Horrible in literally every way.
Firstly, I'm impressed that anyone shelled out $1000 on this dumpster fire. The whole thing has horrible HDLR that makes it almost impossible to watch. It's like watching a movie through a bad instagram filter. I'm pretty sure the editing was done in i-movie, even the fonts are amatuar. And although cheap and amatuar doesn't always mean bad, this movie is atrocious in every other way imaginable.
I see a couple other reviews saying it's good because you can't figure out the mystery, but that isn't because it's well written. It's because the plot is non existent and you have no idea whats going on. I literally could not tell you what that movie is about. I'm not even sure what the mystery was. There were stories woven into it but most of them didn't make sense when pieced together and were just confusing. Even the acting was horrible, and there was almost no dialogue.
I would say it's worth watching to make fun of, but it's not. It's almost impossible to sit through, even when I was watching it with two other people making commentary. It took us almost 3 days to watch the whole thing, because it's not just uncomfortable and confusing it's also really boring somehow. We had to keep stopping it to take breaks.
I've also seen this movie compared to A Clock Work Orange more then once, but I liked A Clock Work Orange a lot. And I would rather stab my eyes with knitting needles then be forced to sit through this again.
Hot Bot (2016)
If you laugh, it will be at it not with it.
I'm going to start off by saying if you are watching this "comedy" for sex scenes, you will be sorely disappointed because no one gets laid. I will say I did enjoy the first thirty or so minutes of this film, solely to Mystery Science 3000 it. The film has numerous plot holes and problems, that I will detail below.
For one, the annoying fat kid is clearly a discount Seth from Superbad, but not funny or likeable. The other one, I couldn't even tell you about because he has the personality of a desk lamp. I'm not even sure if he spoke the entire movie because he is that forgettable.
Secondly, a lot of the plot didn't make sense or was just stupid. I may have misunderstood this, but did the sex shop owner say the thing ran on Wi-Fi? What? And why on earth would you need to give it your credit card information, which apparently charged the kids dad $70,000. Are you meaning to tell me that a 500k sex robot has micro transactions? Who so going to shell out that kind of money just to be charged more to use the damn thing. Speaking of the price, I swear at the beginning they said it cost 500k but then later the FBI (who were involved for some reason) said it cost a little under 300k. Also, at the end this robot just boards a flight with no issues well the FBI gets cavity searched. Are you telling me two FBI agents can't get through TSA un-scathed but sex robot somehow walked through a metal detector and boarded a plane no problem?
I also thought it was worth mentioning there was an odd and uncomfortable scene where the senator breaks into the boring ones house, talks about his old masterbation habits and then molests the guy for no obvious reason.