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akumastar
Reviews
NCIS: Naval Criminal Investigative Service: Canary (2013)
Appalling
This episode read like a snuff film. I wanted Khan's lawyers to show up throw the book at the entire force and have every single one fired.
Unrealistic plot that belongs in a comic book. I'd love to have access to this magic money tree that funds planes, actors, sets, sound effects, the lot. I was hoping they would at least show a hint of disapproval from someone higher up, but not so much as a slap on the wrist. Appalling writing, appalling directing, the "twist" was about as subtle as an anvil, Khan should have kept his mouth shut, can't believe I empathised with him! I thought he would be the real underdog and wouldn't stand for the psychological torture. What an amazing episode that would have been! The whole crew realising just how hard they blew it and facing some consequences for a change!
Unfortunately we're stuck with the absolute ungabunga logic of "me good guy you bad guy"
Someone on the writing and directing team needs a serious intervention and possibly therapy.
NCIS: Naval Criminal Investigative Service (2003)
You'd be better off watching torture porn
This show is SO generic, I actually confused it for a different cop show!
The plotlines are practically sci-fi they're so unrealistic. For the first time I found myself rooting for the criminal character, and wanted the protagonists to understand the repercussions of their sheer sadism, and selfish, wasteful actions. I understand you're supposed to suspend your belief for a moment, but the entirety of this is just pathetic. I found myself wanting the commissioner to confiscate their badges and guns! Couldn't empathise with the characters we're supposed to like one bit.
Atrocious writing, one-dimensional characters that are all one note. Man cop. Funny cop. Sexy girl cop. Tech guy. Glasses nerd. Quirky girl. Old man cop. Completely unoriginal, completely boring. No-one faces any consequences for their actions, the protagonists face no real struggle or challenge, and the entire thing can be summarised with "I'm right and you're wrong because I said so, and I'm better and smarter than you, so THERE!" Much like a schoolyard scrap. Which about shows the intelligence of the characters, too.
Blue Bloods (2010)
You'd be better off watching torture porn
When I sit down to watch a cop show, I hope to see three dimensional characters you love to root for, fighting crime, enforcing the law, all while being likable, and the show allowing for at least a little realism while offering a slight suspension of disbelief. Bluebloods offers exactly none of that.
In all my years, I have never found myself rooting for a criminal character so much. Each episode is reminiscent of a snuff film of cops committing atrocities and psychologically torturing people using techniques that wouldn't look out of place in a kid's comic book. I found myself wanting heavy consequences for the protagonists, the heroes, the cops we're supposed to like. I found myself wanting their superiors to come down on them like a ton of bricks, to confiscate their badges and guns. I wanted them to understand the time, money and resources they wasted. I wanted to see them fall, then an epic redemption arc where they right their wrongs and return to glory.
Instead, the characters were patted on the back and a throwaway comment of "we'll end up paying for this" was delivered, but if you blinked, you'd have missed it. There are no consequences for these characters, no evidence of them actually obeying the laws they were supposed to uphold. In 2022, I don't think it's unreasonable for a cop show to offer a struggle rather than "police good, everyone else bad" and show a bap cop getting their comeuppance.
Onto the characters themselves, good lord! The casting is fine and all, but I suppose the casting could work for anyone when you instruct them to play the most one note, one dimensional characters in existence! There's the man cop, the funny man cop, the sexy girl cop, tech guy, quirky girl, old tough guy cop... Reduced to their one singular trait, the list goes on! Very few redeeming qualities beyond a witty quip or looks alone. There's a severe lack of depth to these characters who exhibit sadism towards anyone they deem a suspect.
Shoddy work all round. I've never wanted to punch a protagonist so much in my life. Being on the force requires a certain amount of emotional intelligence, and each episode seems to be a repeat of "I know I'm right because I'm the good guy and you're the bad guy, and because I said so."
I've seen more depth and complexity in a bowl of soup. Show some writing skills please.