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The Blair Witch Project (1999)
Quite A Chilling Experience
I believe a scary movie, can only be effective once. You never know what's going to happen next, your at the edge of your seat, staring off into the darkness to see whats lurking there, this movie mastered that. Once your drawn in, it doesn't let you go. I personally, was drawn in entirely, I felt like I was actually there with them the entire time, thus is why the movie was incredibly effective to me.
The actual story in the movie surrounding the legend is creepy as hell. Children are vanishing, one by one until they are eventually found butchered inside a secluded house deep in the woods. Killed by a deranged man telling everyone an old woman ghost told him to kill them all. The little girl disappearing for days, then returning babbling about an old woman who's feet never touched the ground. The whole making one kid face into the corner while he killed the other, then killing the one in the corner. That definitely stuck in my mind until the end. When Mike says, "Its a house." nearing the end, I began to tense up. Imagining myself in that situation is absolutely terrifying. Out in the middle of nowhere, in a forest in pitch black, your friend is yelling for help and you stubble upon a house...Jesus. When the girl descends down into the dark, scary as hell, cellar, that moment she turns and you see Mike in the corner, that moment was extremely terrifying and effective. The fact thats what that murderer would do, and he was caught and executed years ago, so he's out of the question...just gave me a flood of chills. Its just scary, there's no other words I can think of. I can only picture what else was in that room. That other kid butchered on the floor? The "Blair Witch"? Yeesh, it just scares me.
The fact you don't see anything is the exact reason why this movie scared the crap out of me. Im going to say what a lot of other people have already said, it did was Jaws did for going into the water and what Psycho did for taking a shower. Not only dark forests, but just staring into darkness scares me because of this movie. No other movie has scared me the way this one has. Like I said once you've seen it, thats it. Its only effective once, but hell, its powerful. This movie was a frightening experience, and I loved it. I can safely say, this movie is definitely one of my favourites. I just really really hope I don't fall asleep one night, and I end up dreaming up being in any situation resembling The Blair Witch Project.
After Death (Oltre la morte) (1989)
Semi-Decent Zombie Flick
This one doesn't pack quite the punch of hilarity and fun as most other Italian zombie flicks do, but I can at least say it was half decent. The story goes like this...
Some scientists on an island are trying to cure cancer and end up killing a little girl, who's father is an overweight, poorly acted voodoo priest. He gets upset and decides to raise the dead. What happens after that is a blur. For the most part I wasn't too interested.
The music was awful (especially during the beginning of the movie). Most of the zombies were dressed in odd black sheets n robes. The acting was pretty bad and cheesy but didn't have that lovable cheesy feel to it (Not like say, Hell of the Living Dead or Zombi 3).
Overall, it wasn't exactly what I anticipated. I do have very mixed feelings about it, but it definitely didn't impress me, nor make me laugh. A very, VERY semi-decent zombie flick.
5/10
-Matt
Virus (1980)
Ridiculously Awesome!
Oh, Hell of the Living Dead... This has got to be one of my favourite zombie movies of all time. I'll start off by saying this movie is a complete and utter rip-off of Dawn of the Dead. It's the Italian version of Dawn of the Dead basically. The music, characters, and even some of the scenes are (for the most part) almost identical to Dawn of the Dead. With that said, now onto what makes this movie so god damn enjoyable.
1. The acting/dialogue. This is the high point of this movie. It's what makes each scene better than the one before. The part where Lt. London is on the walkie-talkie complaining about being stuck in the valley is priceless. "For Christ answer...I'm getting, figgin fed up of this, valley!....OVER." There's way too many funny things said and done to list. All I can say is, if you haven't seen this movie...go out and buy it. From beginning to end, the acting never lets down with its endless amount of hilarity.
2. The dubbing. Not only is the acting amazingly funny, and the dialogue terribly funny, but the dubbing...is the icing on the cake. Its just all around terrible.At one part, there was a black guy speaking, with the weirdest white guys voice dubbed in over top. Made me smile.
3. The zombies. The zombies were actually pretty wicked. They looked and acted just like how zombies should. I don't think there were any memorable zombies in this flick for me, but overall...they were done amazingly well.
4. The gore.The gore was overall pretty good. Some parts were pretty bad, a zombie would be holding the "flesh and guts" in place while he chewed and you could clearly see it was fake. While other parts, like where one zombie buries his hand into the chicks mouth and rips out her tongue, then her eyeballs pop out. Hahaha, that was awesome. We also got to see some animal (looked like an alligator or something to me) be gutted and all of its insides exposed.
All in all, this movies a gem. Its extremely funny and entertaining, by accident. Everything about it is just so overly ridiculous. Highly suggest picking it up if you like zombie flicks or for a good laugh.
6/10
-Matt
Zombi 3 (1988)
Horribly Fun!
So basically the story is as follows. The military (for some reason) is developing a toxin that revives the dead, and while it's being transported, it is stolen by some terrorists. The terrorists are all gunned down, but one escapes with the toxin, unfortunately he ends up cutting himself on the vile somehow and becomes infected. He then flees and finds refuge in a crappy motel. There, he kills and spreads the disease to a poor maid (Ill explain her death a little later). The terrorists corpse is then cremated which in turn, spreads the virus throughout the land. OK, well...lets start with some of the things that stood out to me.
1.That god damn smoke. What is with this, in every scene there seems to be endless amounts of smoke being pumped out everywhere.
2.Karate soldiers. When these soldiers are battling off hordes of undead corpses and they don't have fire power on them, they resort to their mastered ninja skills. Look out for an assortment of karate chops, kicks, and throws.
3.Mirror Death. What...the...hell. The terrorist who turns into a zombie kills a poor maid by yes, smearing the maids face into a mirror, causing massive hemorrhaging and ultimately killing her.
4.The special effects. The gore overall is pretty good, tons of blood and guts and visceral feasting. After being bitten, you don't immediately turn into a zombie, the bite turns into some disgusting looking mutated fungus that pulsates and oozes blood and green gunk. But...at the very start, when the terrorists are fleeing and the military is shooting at them, there are no effects once so ever. The helicopter shoots a couple of guys and when they get shot, they jump up into the air and fall down. No entry wound, no blood, just a guy going "Argh!" jumping up and falling down.
5.The zombies. There are so many things to mention about the zombies. Theirs zombie people, zombie birds, even zombie fish (their must've been zombie fish because a zombie pushes a girl out of a window and she falls into this lake, one of the soldiers dives in to save her, and when he pulls her up, her legs have been eaten and she's instantly a zombie), most of the zombies don't just mindlessly roam, most of them are hiding, yes hiding. They wait till you walk past then jump out from behind a bush or from behind a wall. Speaking of jumping, there are at least 10 zombies that literally fall from the top of the screen then start attacking. Inside or outside, they just fall and attack. There's even one zombie thats on the top of some 20 foot poll that jumps down, and I have no clue how he could of got up there. You've got your typical stumbling, moaning zombies, and you've got your acrobatic, brawling zombies, that not only want to tear you apart limb by limb, but want to beat you up before. I can recall the part on the bridge where one zombie gives a soldier a dirty haymaker then proceeds to put him in a headlock. My favourite was the deranged zombie at the gas station wielding a machete. He was vicious, jumping all over, smashing into tons of stuff, he really looked like he wanted to hunt that chick down and tear her apart.
6.The theme music. There seems to only be one song that plays whenever something is happening. I liked the theme music, but after every time a zombie attacks or every time a soldier starts running, it gets kinda of annoying.
7.Flying zombie head. That was ridiculous. They were looking around in the hotel and found a refrigerator. They opened it up and a zombie head flew out and chomped on the guys neck. The guy fell and the zombie head flew into the air and then flew down to the guys neck again.You have to see it to know how unnecessary it was.
8. The guys in the white jumpsuits. These guys were badass. All they did was gun everybody down. Zombies, survivors, they didn't care, they were on orders to shoot everyone, and thats what they did. Hell, they even killed one of he main characters.
9. The hilarious dialogue. Oh man. It's spread throughout the entire movie, but pay attention closely when the scientist guy is telling the general guy that they are going to try to find an antidote. That guys acting is priceless.
Overall, it was a ridiculously bad, good time. It's a fast paced movie so it doesn't get boring, and its loaded with tons of things that make it so...unique.
6/10
-Matt