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simonmills47
Reviews
About Time (2013)
Worthless sentimental trash
I have nothing more to say about this terrible film beyond the title of my review.
The Bees (1978)
The inconvenient truth about killer bees...
Spoilers coming-but it really doesn't matter.
Angry bees attack the UN to assert joint control of the world between themselves and mankind. If we don't leave them in peace, they dispose of us. Enough said, except for the fact that the UN bees are entirely different from the set of angry bees that menace mankind in the first half of the film. Frankly this film was a lot more entertaining than "An inconvenient truth", AND it has John Saxon, and John Carradine to boot. The fight between Saxon and the Mexican hit-man (yes, this film has everything) is a real treat.
This film should undoubtedly be on the global school curriculum.
Bubba Ho-Tep (2002)
Elvis and JFK Vs the Demon
This film has just had a UK DVD release. It is so little known that there is a risk it will be ignored on the rental shelves by people who simply won't know how good it is. This film deserves more than a cult following.
Point one: it is based on a Joe R Lansdale story. Point two, it stars Bruce Campbell of Evil Dead fame. Point three: It has Elvis and JFK (who is black, has a moustache, with part of his brain replaced with a bag of sand-obviously) fighting an ancient Egyptian demon. They turn out to have been in the same retirement home for many years.
It is hilarious. I expect if you're into romantic comedies, or more serious stuff then this will leave you cold. However, if you liked Shaun of the Dead, or you don't mind your film to be just a little bit mad, then this is probably for you.
Closer (2004)
Tedious, badly-acted, mind-numbing drivel.
This is the latest in a long line of must-like films. Oooh! There's swearing! Oooh! People shout at each other and get depressed! Oooh! it's about relationships! Oooh! it's really clever! The truth is, as everyone knows, that the film is simply dire. It is successful, because it is mandatory to claim to enjoy films like this, even though they are devoid of any single meritorious feature.The cast can't act, (particularly Jude Law playing his usual smug role), and the story has no touch with reality at all. The dialogue is laughable, and pretentious. Closer is invalid and should not even exist.
The only spoiler here is the film itself-it will spoil your evening.
Janghwa, Hongryeon (2003)
See this masterpiece before Hollywood destroys it.
The recent history of Hollywood remakes of ghost/horror films from the East has been dismal. This film will inevitably suffer the same fate, so get a copy on e-bay or similar.
It is well photographed and the sound is superb. Viewing on a good screen and with a good 5.1 or DTS enabled sound system is recommended. Obviously it is subtitled, so if that puts you off, then I wouldn't bother with this. Dubbing rarely works and simply would not do here.
It is also genuinely frightening, with excellent performances from a cast who will be unfamiliar to Western audiences. I would particularly single out the stepmother character, who was utterly brilliant. The ending will have you wanting to watch it again, if you can cope. The plot is relentless, and offers no comforting moments of release along the way.
If I do have a small criticism, there is perhaps a detectable influence in certain scenes from the Japanese version of The Ring. We have, however, accepted straight copies of other peoples' ideas for Western films for years, and so my point is a limited one which did not prevent me from giving it 10/10. I believe most fans of this genre will derive huge "pleasure" from this film which I for one hope goes down as a classic.
Lost in Translation (2003)
Massively over-rated.
It astonishes me that so many people would love a film where nothing actually happens at all. The reason is simple-most people rightly love Bill Murray, and Scarlett Johansson has a growing reputation. When the chap is wavering about watching the film, she is thrown in as a bonus, and he agrees to see it. From there, once a film acquires a reputation as undeserved as this, it is almost compulsory to love it- the middle classes sit around their dinner tables, and all smugly agree how good it is, no matter what they actually think of it.
I am angry that I have seen this film, and I am angry that it is so popular; it simply reflects how low our society has sunk, and how little we expect from popular entertainment.
The 'R' word should not be lightly thrown around, but as well this film being extremely annoying, I wonder if I am alone in being very disturbed about how disrespectful the movie is to Japanese society and culture?
Black Hawk Down (2001)
Excellent, but one flaw!
Blackhawk Down features genuinely harrowing and tense battle sequences, but for me is slightly let down by what I consider to be a dreadful performance from Ewan McGregor, as a normally deskbound soldier thrust into battle. I bet I'm not the only one who found his "cup of Joe" line to be actually embarassing, and they have even managed to shoehorn into the cast one of his sidekicks from "Trainspotting" as an American soldier too. Fortunately his appearances are relatively rare, and not enough in themselves to be off-putting. Very well worth it, especially on a good home theatre system. I have given it 9/10, and taken off the one point because of this casting error.