- Douglas 'Doug' Yancy Funnie: So Roger had to give all the money back and we started our fundraising drive all over again. And this time, we didn't even have to go door to door.
- Connie Benge: Dark clothes.
- Douglas 'Doug' Yancy Funnie: What?
- Larry the A.V. Nerd: And vertical stripes hide it easier.
- Douglas 'Doug' Yancy Funnie: Hide what?
- [grabs stomach]
- Douglas 'Doug' Yancy Funnie: My fat?
- Connie Benge: Oh, we're not fat, Doug.
- [flexes]
- Connie Benge: I'm big boned.
- Larry the A.V. Nerd: And-and-and I'm stout.
- Douglas 'Doug' Yancy Funnie: Well, what am I?
- Larry the A.V. Nerd, Connie Benge: Husky.
- Mrs. Wingo: And so many of the larger mammals, bears, elephants, whales, have several extra layers of fatty tissue to keep them warm in the winter.
- Patricia 'Patti' Mayonnaise: But, Mrs. Wingo, what do they do in the summertime? Do they get hot?
- Mrs. Wingo: Well, now, why don't we ask someone who knows a lot about blubber?
- [everyone stares at Doug]
- Mrs. Wingo: [to Doug] What do you think, Fatty Fatty Fatty?
- Theda Funnie: [when Doug gets off the bus] Douglas, you're here!
- Phil Funnie: You're home!
- Judy Funnie: You're... huge!
- Douglas 'Doug' Yancy Funnie: [while hiding behind the curtains] Uh, hi, Skeet. What's up?
- Skeeter: Just wanted to see if you made it back in one piece. Cool dress.
- Douglas 'Doug' Yancy Funnie: It's not a dress. I just don't... I don't feel well.
- [Doug runs behind a chair]
- Skeeter: Whoa, man, calm down. How come you're so jittery?
- Douglas 'Doug' Yancy Funnie: Can't you tell?
- Skeeter: Uh-uh.
- Douglas 'Doug' Yancy Funnie: [steps away from the chair] Whew! I thought maybe I looked a little... different.
- Skeeter: No, you look just the same... only fat.
- [Doug frowns heavily]