Tony Randall: Felix Unger

Quotes 

• Claire Frost : When you come home, be sure you step on the papers, because I'm going to shampoo the rug.

  Felix Unger : Oh, about that. I wonder if that could wait till tomorrow. You see, Mr. Madison's a sportswriter, and he wants to watch the football game on TV tonight.

  Claire Frost : Mr. Unger, who's the housekeeper here, you or me?

  Felix Unger : Well, you are, of course, but Mr. Madison's the patient, and I guess we'll just... we'll have to humor him.

  Claire Frost : I'm not Soupy Sales, and this is not the Comedy Hour.

  Felix Unger : You do have a way of filling a room with tension, don't you?

  Claire Frost : Mr. Unger, I know your type. You want to be liked. But in my job, you can't be soft. You have to wield an iron mop.

  Felix Unger : Ms. Frost, I am no powder puff, appearances to the contrary notwithstanding. He's going to watch the ball game. I'm putting my foot down.

  Claire Frost : Do you think you're any match for me?

  Felix Unger : No, but I'm... I'm... I'm putting my foot down.

  Claire Frost : When I left the army, I made a promise to myself. I said, "Frosty, there can only be one top kick in any outfit, and that's me."

  Felix Unger : I was a lieutenant in the army.

  Claire Frost : I was a colonel!