- Michael Knight: Boy, I don't believe this place. It's like it's frozen out of the fifties. I keep expecting to see Wally and the Beaver.
- K.I.T.T.: Wally and the Beaver? That doesn't compute Michael. Are they a part of the counterfeit operation?
- Michael Knight: No, just part of my past, KITT.
- Devon Miles: Although it may seem unlikely to you, Michael, it is barely conceivable that you may find part of my speech... interesting
- Michael Knight: Writing is hell? I thought the expression was 'war is hell'.
- Jobina: Obviously said by someone who never attempted to write.
- Agent Larkin: There are two rules in this business, young lady, and rule number one is 'never become involved with a potential adversary'.
- Jobina: What's rule number two?
- Agent Larkin: 'Never become involved with a potential friend'.
- Jobina: Tough rules.
- Agent Larkin: Well, it's a tough business. That's what keeps America great.
- Sheriff Moore: Knight, I don't know who or what you are, but you are not a cop. And in this town, the cops will pursue the suspects, ok?
- Devon Miles: [on viewscreen] Kitt, what's happening? I've been trying to reach Michael for over an hour.
- K.I.T.T.: Michael is... indisposed.
- Devon Miles: Oh, that means he's either with a young lady or he's in jail.
- K.I.T.T.: No comment.
- Devon Miles: I admire your loyalty, Kitt. Frankly I'd just as soon not know, unless of course he's in real trouble.
- Devon Miles: Well, now that Aunt Martha is back at the helm of the Hallelujah Press again, she wanted each of you to have a keepsake.
- Bonnie Barstow: Ah, a Bible.
- Michael Knight: Hey, that's nice.
- Bonnie Barstow: Beautiful, isn't it?
- Devon Miles: Yes, quite. And informative.
- K.I.T.T.: May I ask who programmed it?
- Michael Knight: [Michael, Devon and Bonnie laugh awkwardly] Well, that's, eh, kind of a long story, KITT.
- K.I.T.T.: That's all right, Michael, I have plenty of time.
- K.I.T.T.: [crashing through the jailhouse walls and screeching to a halt near where Michael is lying in his cell] You rang, Michael?
- Bonnie Barstow: [ever efficient] Oh, Kitt's rotors are overheating. I'll increase the gap five degrees and retime.
- Michael Knight: Am I interrupting something here or what?
- Devon Miles: Relax, Michael. We'll manage to capture your counterfeiter.
- Michael Knight: Good. When?
- Devon Miles: We'll get together immediately after my speech.
- [is reminded]
- Devon Miles: My speech.
- [pats his pockets]
- Devon Miles: Bonnie, I seem to have misplaced my note cards.
- Bonnie Barstow: [ever efficient] Your left pocket.
- Bonnie Barstow: [as Michael is about to rush off in K.I.T.T] Not even a goodbye? See you later? Aloha?
- Michael Knight: Aloha.
- Devon Miles: Cheers.
- Michael Knight: Cheers!
- [rushes off]
- Jobina: [visiting Michael in jail] Look, I would have baked you a cake with a hacksaw blade in it, but I flunked home economics.