Father Ted (TV Series)
Good Luck, Father Ted (1995)
Dermot Morgan: Father Ted Crilly
Photos
Quotes
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Father Ted Crilly : Uh... Dougal... there's uh... some shaving cream there.
Father Dougal McGuire : No, no, Ted, your grand.
Father Ted Crilly : No... on you.
Father Dougal McGuire : Oh... where exactly Ted?
Father Ted Crilly : Just there, below your ear.
Father Dougal McGuire : Here?
Father Ted Crilly : Yes and there's... uh... there's a bit more...
Father Dougal McGuire : Gone?
Father Ted Crilly : No, there's still just a tiny... Dougal, its all over the place!
Father Dougal McGuire : How on Earth did that get there?... I didn't even shave this morning!
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Father Ted Crilly : So... let me get this straight. You were up on an old man, riding him around and whipping him. For an hour.
Father Dougal McGuire : Yes.
Father Ted Crilly : You realise that image will stay with me for the rest of my life?
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[Talking to Dougal at Funland]
Father Ted Crilly : You're supposed to be taking Jack for his walk.
Father Dougal McGuire : Well erm, the cliffs were closed for the day.
Father Ted Crilly : How can the cliffs be closed Dougal?
Father Dougal McGuire : OK no, it wasn't that. They were gone
Father Ted Crilly : Gone? The cliffs were gone. How could they just disappear?
Father Dougal McGuire : Erosion.
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Tom : Father! I've killed a man.
Father Ted : Er, well, we'll talk about that later, Tom. Right now, I'm going to be on the telly!
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Tom : Father... I've killed a man.
Father Ted Crilly : Er, well, we'll talk about that later, Tom. Right now, I'm going to be on the telly!
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Mrs Doyle : Who's for tea?
Father Dougal : Me please, Mrs. Doyle.
Father Jack Hackett : Tea? Feck!
Father Ted : I'm fine Mrs. Doyle.
Mrs Doyle : [to Father Jack] And what do you say to a cup?
Father Jack Hackett : [shouts] Feck off cup!