Cheers (TV Series)

Thanksgiving Orphans (1986)

Ted Danson: Sam Malone

Photos 

Quotes 

• Sam Malone : Come on, you guys, come on. We don't have to bite each others' heads off here.

  Cliff Clavin : It may be the only thing we get to eat this day, Sammy.

• Sam Malone : Oh, look at that will you? Nice Rudolph.

  Woody Boyd : I made it myself.

  Sam Malone : No kidding?

  Woody Boyd : You know, Rudolph is my favourite guy in the Christmas song.

  Sam Malone : Yeah.

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Apparently then Woody, you're unaware that the story of "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" is one of the most unrealistic and therefore potentially damaging in all of children's music. It gives them a horribly distorted view of reality.

  Woody Boyd : Yeah, but you got to admit, it's easy to whistle.

  Dr. Frasier Crane : No, I'm serious. First the other reindeer tease and then ostracise him. And then when his abnormality proves of service, they use him.

  Dr. Frasier Crane : [Sam and Woody are speechless]  But then do they allow him to play in their stupid reindeer games?

  Sam Malone , Woody Boyd : Yes.

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Oh, no, I know how the song goes. In fact, not only do Donner, Blitzen, et al, not love him and laugh out loud with glee, but they doubly dispise the bulbous-nosed little wimp.

  Dr. Frasier Crane : [Frasier gets up]  Well, I've got to be off. Happy Holidays!

  [Frasier leaves, Sam and Woody are shocked] 

• Woody Boyd : This is Thanksgiving, and I still say this is going to be the greatest.

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Oh, who the hell do we think we're kidding? We're all a bunch of pathetic dropouts. Scorned by our loved ones - as if anybody ever loved us at all.

  Sam Malone : Hey, will you lighten up, man? The only thing wrong here is, we're hungry. Now, who else wants to join me in these... ice cold potatoes?

  Cliff Clavin : It'll go great here with the Jell-o soup.

  Dr. Frasier Crane : I'm dying to try some of the hair growing on the crudités!

• Diane : Sam, I had thought... we might spend the holidays together, but when you made no move in that direction, I... made these alternate plans, I hope it won't spoil your holiday.

  Sam Malone : Thank you, no, I have... I have other plans.

  Diane : Oh... good, I'm glad to hear that. And in all fairness I will understand if you get an empty court for the day. It wouldn't hurt my feelings in the slightest.

  [Smiles and starts walking away] 

  Sam Malone : Good, good, because I already have a date with Wendy.

  Diane : [Tearfully]  How could you...

  Sam Malone : Now you just said that it was okay, didn't you?

  Diane : [Mimicking a child]  Ye-e-e-es.

  [Sam looks away from her and pulls an astonished face] 

  Diane : I'm sorry!

  [Stifles a sob] 

  Diane : It's fine. Enjoy.

  Sam Malone : Thank you.

  Diane : Besides, I know that we'll have many holidays together when you and I are one.

  [Smiles sweetly] 

  Sam Malone : You already *are* one, Diane.

  [Gives a giggle as Diane smiles at him] 

• Norm Peterson : Everybody get enough to eat?

  Dr. Frasier Crane : You know, I never had a chance to try the potatoes.

  Sam Malone : [scooping mashed potatoes off the mantelpiece onto Frasier's plate]  Oh, well here, let me...

• Sam Malone : Come on, tell us what happened.

  Diane : I'm afraid my golden afternoon has turned to dross!

  Woody Boyd : [Looks out the window]  Yeah, I thought it was clouding up out there...