- Diane Chambers: Do you believe in intuition?
- Woody Boyd: No, but I have this strange feeling someday I will.
- Sam Malone: [to Diane about their proposal history] You want me to propose to you, I propose to you. You say, "no". I say, "fine, I never want to see you again". You drive me nuts telling me you want me to propose again. I do, you turn me down. Next thing I know, I'm in a court of law where I've got to propose to you or I'll go to jail. It's the classic American love story.
- Diane Chambers: What's wrong?
- Sam Malone: I just had a flash that I got the electric chair for killing you.
- Diane Chambers: Well, that's silly. Massachussetts doesn't have the death penalty.
- Sam Malone: What?
- Sam Malone: [about Diane] You mean I have to propose to her to keep from going to jail, where I wouldn't be going in the first place if she'd said 'yes' to any one of my three proposals?
- Judge William E. Grey: That's a very ironic way of putting it.
- [Sam is dreaming he is on death row for killing Diane]
- Sam Malone: Father, do you really believe in the afterlife?
- Priest: Yes, my son, I do.
- Sam Malone: [about Diane] Well, good. Maybe I can find her there and get her again.
- Cliff Clavin: Hey Woody, Miss Indiana!
- [Cliff is watching a pageant on TV, and Woody is cleaning the bar]
- Woody Boyd: Yeah, but Boston's my home now.
- Tom Babson: Hey everybody, you're not going to believe this.
- Cliff Clavin: You passed the bar, I'll believe anything.
- Tom Babson: Yeah? Well, Sam's in jail, smartypants.
- Carla Tortelli: What?
- Tom Babson: Yeah, Diane had him arrested for assault and battery.
- Carla Tortelli: My hero.
- [She pronounces it hera]
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Is Diane alright?
- Tom Babson: I think she's fine, I just don't have all the details.
- Norm Peterson: Well, how do you know all this stuff?
- Tom Babson: Sam called me to retain my services.
- Cliff Clavin: To do what, prune his trees?
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Has he been arraigned yet?
- Tom Babson: No, two o'clock.
- Carla Tortelli: Well maybe we ought to go down to the courthouse, in case Sammy needs character witnesses.
- Tom Babson: No, they don't do that until the trial, Carla.
- Norm Peterson: Well what sort of defense are you planning on using?
- Tom Babson: I"m thinking about pleading insanity.
- Cliff Clavin: Yeah, yeah, that's a good idea. What about Sammy?
- Norm Peterson: Afternoon, everybody!
- [the usual reply comes back NORM!]
- Woody Boyd: How are you today Mr. Peterson?
- Norm Peterson: Never been better, Woody.
- [pauses]
- Norm Peterson: Just once I'd *like* to be better.
- Sam Malone: What's the matter... you've got a weird look on your face.
- [Diane is leaning on the bar and smiling at him]
- Diane Chambers: I don't know if I should tell you.
- Sam Malone: Well, let me help you out. Don't.
- Diane Chambers: Well Sam, this morning I woke up with the most overwhelming feeling that... you would propose today.
- Sam Malone: Phew! Talk about fate, talk about coincidence...
- Diane Chambers: [She rushes to his side] You had the same feeling?
- Sam Malone: No, I just wish you would talk about fate or coincidence.