Comedy Central Presents (TV Series)

Carlos Mencia (2002)

Carlos Mencia: Self

Photos 

Quotes 

• Carlos Mencia : We gotta be honest with our kids! If your short ass son says "dad, am I gonna be in the NBA?" Ya gotta tell em..."NO son, you're gonna be in the fuckin' circus!"

• Carlos Mencia : You don't want to be the person that had a fight, a little insignificant fight with your spouse. So you did it, and you were pissed, but you stayed pissed at your wife. Not cause it was real, but hell, we'll make up later. In the morning you woke up, and things were still bad, but you kept that... cause hey, I'll come back. And then what happened? You went to your building, and you were, sadly, on that 90th floor and 9/11 happened, and you're never going back home again. The best you could do is call your woman or man and say "I love you." And you missed that last night. Why? Because you thought it would last forever. See, every comedy show you've ever been to ends with a big joke. Cause that's what you need. I end with a big joke, you laugh, I say goodnight, and that's how it's supposed to be. But that ain't life my friends, if you learn one thing from me, it's that sometimes, sometimes...