Margaret Cho: I'm the One That I Want (2000 TV Special)

Margaret Cho: Self

Quotes 

• Margaret Cho : I wasn't like any Korean role-model that they had ever seen. I didn't play violin. I didn't fuck Woody Allen.

• Margaret Cho : I was on this ship with 800 lesbians... we can't get off... so much drama. 'Were you looking at her or her or her or her or her or her or her or her or her or her or her or her? Well were you?'

• [imitating her mother] 

  Margaret Cho : I know a gay, his name is Paul. And Paul is so nice, but Paul only like two thing: He like ass and Judy Garland and that's all.

• Margaret Cho : And I went through this whole thing, you know. I was like: Am I gay? Am I straight? And I realized I'm just slutty.

  [laughter] 

  Margaret Cho : Where's my parade? What about Slut Pride?

• Margaret Cho : I love my gay male friends, but when I was a little girl I always wished that I would be constantly surrounded by gorgeous guys... and I am, and I should have been more specific.

• Margaret Cho : [imitating Gwen]  Hi my name is Gwen, and I'm here to WAAAAAAAAAASH your vagina.

• Margaret Cho : I... am a fag hag. Fag hags are the backbone of the gay community. Without us, you're nothing. We have been there... dragging your sorry ass through the Underground Railroad... We went to the prom with you...

• Margaret Cho : [imitating her mother on answering machine]  "ARE YOU GAY?"

• Margaret Cho : [imitating her mother]  I have to tell you something: Grandma and Grandpa are gonna die. I don't know when they're gonna die... but sometime. So Mommy just tell you now, so when they die you're not surprised.