Super Troopers (2001)
Steve Lemme: Mac
Photos
Quotes
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Captain O'Hagan : I swear to God I'll pistol whip the next guy who says "Shenanigans."
Mac : Hey Farva what's the name of that restaurant you like with all the goofy shit on the walls and the mozzarella sticks?
Farva : You mean Shenanigans?
Mac : OOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
Thorny : OOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
[as they offer the Captain their pistols]
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[Foster and Mac have pulled a man over for speeding and are deciding what game to play]
Mac : All right, how about "Cat Game?"
Foster : Cat Game? What's the record?
Mac : Thorny did six, but I think you can do ten.
Foster : Ten? Starting right 'meow?'
[Mac laughs - they walk up to the car, and Foster taps on the driver side]
Larry Johnson : Sorry about the...
Foster : All right meow. (1) Hand over your license and registration.
[the man hands him his license]
Foster : Your registration? Hurry up meow. (2)
[Mac ticks off two fingers]
Larry Johnson : Sorry.
[the man laughs a little]
Foster : Is there something funny here boy?
Larry Johnson : Oh, no.
Foster : Then why you laughing, Mister... Larry Johnson?
[pause]
Foster : All right meow, (3) where were we?
Larry Johnson : Excuse me, are you saying meow?
Foster : Am I saying meow?
[Mac puts his hands up for the fourth one, but makes an "eehhh" facial expression, as he is considering the last one]
Larry Johnson : I thought...
Foster : Don't think boy. Meow, (4) do you know how fast you were going?
[man laughs]
Foster : Meow. (5) What is so damn funny?
Larry Johnson : I could have sworn you said meow.
Foster : Do I look like a cat to you, boy? Am I jumpin' around all nimbly bimbly from tree to tree?
[Mac is gut-busting laughing]
Foster : Am I drinking milk from a saucer?
[feigned anger]
Foster : Do you see me eating mice?
Foster : [Mac and the man are laughing their heads off now] You stop laughing right meow! (6)
Larry Johnson : [the man stops and swallows hard] Yes sir.
Foster : Meow, (7) I'm gonna have to give you a ticket on this one. No buts meow. (8) It's the law.
[rips off the ticket and hands it to the man]
Foster : Not so funny meow, (9) is it?
Foster : [Foster gets up to leave, but Mac shakes his hands at him, indicating only nine meows] Meow! (10)
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Mac : Oh, c'mon, we're like the sons you never had.
Captain O'Hagan : If you were my son, Mac, I would've smothered you by now.
Mac : Smothered me in gravy you big dirty man.
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Captain O'Hagan : Bulletproof cup, huh? I invented this gag, Rabbit. Only in my day, the rookie got naked.
[fires through the window, accidentally shooting out the glass]
Captain O'Hagan : And we also used blanks. You're a sick motherfucker, Mac.
Mac : Thanks, Chief!
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Mac : You boys like Mex-i-co? Yee- Haww!.
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[Farva brings the boys a round of coffee, and has left a surprise in Rabbit's]
Rabbit : [dryly] Oh, look, a bar of soap.
Farva : Oh, shit, I got you good, you fucker!
Mac : *Awesome* prank, Farva.
Farva : Better than the crap you pull, Mac!
Captain O'Hagan : Look, fellas...
Mac : [to Rabbit] Bite it, rook! You'll make him look like a dick!
Rabbit : Nah...
Captain O'Hagan : Every Thursday night I walk into the lodge to play Hearts...
[Mac persists in goading Rabbit as O'Hagan continues]
Mac : Seriously, rook, bite it. Do it. Don't be a wuss!
Captain O'Hagan : ...and they always have my Old-Fashioned just waiting there...
Mac : Don't be a wuss, bite it!
Captain O'Hagan : ...I like that. I like it here...
Mac : Bite it. Bite it!
Captain O'Hagan : [Fed up] Oh, hell! Give me the goddamn soap!
[He grabs the soap, takes a bite, and spits it at Mac]
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Mac : ...And that was the second time I got crabs.
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Captain O'Hagan : What did you find out at the weigh station?
Mac : My cruiser weighs 16,000 kilograms!
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Captain O'Hagan : Did you guys put in for any transfers yet?
Mac : I applied for a guard job - at the post office.
[collective groan]
Thorny : Hey, you'll finally be able to shoot someone.
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Mac : No, Farva, you are under arrest for being a complete and total fuckhead.
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Mac : Your mother should've swallowed you, Rando!
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Mac : [Chugging maple syrup] Three... two... one... DO EET. Oh go girlfriend.
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Mac : You boys like Mex-ee-co? YEEEE-HOO!
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[In a silly voice with his eyes crossed]
Mac : Do we look like the two dumbest guys in the world to you?