Photos
Quotes
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The President : Jiminy Jumpin' Jesus, I can't believe we're gonna pay that madman. I got nukes out the ying-yang. Just let me launch one, for God's sake.
Commander Gilmour : Sir. Are you suggesting that we blow up the moon?
The President : Would you miss it?
[looks around the table]
The President : Would you miss it?
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Dr. Evil : Talk to the hand, 'cause the face don't wanna hear it anymore.
The President : What hand? Talk to your hand?
Dr. Evil : You ain't all that and a bag of potato chips.
The President : What are you talking about?
Dr. Evil : Don't go there, girlfriend.
[snaps fingers]
Dr. Evil : Mmhmm.
The President : Whose girlfriend?
Dr. Evil : Don't mess with me. I'm one crazy mo-fo. I had to pop a cop 'cause he wasn't giving me my props in Oaktown. No? I heard that somewhere.
Scott : You're an idiot.
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Dr. Evil : Mr. President, after I destroy Washington D.C. I will destroy another major city every hour on the hour. That is, unless, of course, you pay me
[emphasis]
Dr. Evil : one hundred billion dollars.
The President : [bursts with laughter] Dr. Evil, this is 1969! That amount of money doesn't even exist.
[laughing]
The President : That's like saying,
[with changed voice]
The President : "I want a kajillion bajillion dollars."
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Dr. Evil : Mr. President, allow me to demonstrate the awesome lethality of the Alan Parsons Project. Fire the laser!
The President : [taking cover as the White House is destroyed] AAAHHH! Damage report! Damage report!
Gen. Hawk : [realizing nothing happened] It's okay. It's all right. Come on.
Dr. Evil : Well, actually, that was just footage from the movie "Independence Day", but the real laser would be a lot like that. Yeah, scary.
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Dr. Evil : Come on, Mr. President, show me the money.
The President : Show you what money?
Dr. Evil : [imitating Tom Cruise] Show me the money! Show me the money! You had me at hello. Tear. Nothing? No?
Scott : Psst! It's 1969. "Jerry Maguire" won't even come out for another 30 years. Nobody knows what you're talking about. Ass.
Dr. Evil : Scott, Daddy's working, okay? And when you're in the main chamber, try and use the big boy voice, okay?
[Scott rolls his eyes]
Dr. Evil : Thank you.