How I Got Into College (1989)
Corey Parker: Marlon Browne
Photos
Quotes
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Marlon Browne : Two men, A and B, are trapped inside my mailbox chained to 200,000 pounds of explosives.
B : This isn't funny!
A : What test is this?
Marlon Browne : If their chains are three inches thick and they have thirty seconds to escape, sawing at one inch per second, what are their chances for survival?
B : Skip it! Go to the next problem!
A : Come on, man! Get us out of here!
Marlon Browne : Who cares? I already got into college.
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Marlon Browne : The interview is going to be key for me, since I'm the type that comes across much better in person than on paper.
Jessica Kailo : Oh, you do?
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Marlon Browne : [the mailman has dropped off a letter in the mailbox, while a dog bites at his leg] Would you do me a favor and open it, please? I'm too nervous.
Mailman : I'd love to.
[he opens the letter and reads it]
Mailman : Marlon Browne? Congratulations.
Marlon Browne : I did it! I got into Ramsey! It's from Ramsey?
Mailman : No, it's from Ed McMahon. You may have already won ten million dollars.
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Arcadia Bible Academy Recruiter : [inside a booth at a college recruiting fair] Welcome to the Arcadia Bible Academy! Last night, Jesus Christ came down to me on a vision in a flaming pie! He said, I want... what's your name?
Marlon Browne : Marlon.
Arcadia Bible Academy Recruiter : Marlon! I want Marlon to attend the Arcadia Bible Academy. Paying full tuition, of course. Son... Jesus *loves* you.
Marlon Browne : He might not if he saw my SAT scores.
Arcadia Bible Academy Recruiter : They're low?
Marlon Browne : Yeah.
Arcadia Bible Academy Recruiter : All right.
[he pats Marlon on the shoulder, Marlon leaves the booth]
Arcadia Bible Academy Recruiter : Jesus!
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Marlon Browne : People choose colleges for all kinds of idiotic reasons, like fraternities and Slavic language departments.
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Marlon Browne : The thing about Ramsey, Dad, is that they actually consider people like me.
Sharon Browne : What does that mean? They're looking for someone with a definitive collection of Silver Surfer comic books?