Micki + Maude (1984)
Dudley Moore: Rob Salinger
Photos
Quotes
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Maude Salinger : [at the wrestling match] Come on, Gorilla, kill that son of a bitch!
Rob Salinger : Gorilla Muldoon, is your father?
Maude Salinger : That's not his real name.
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Rob Salinger : I don't want to divorce, Micki, I just want to marry Maude.
Leo Brody : You can't have your cake and eat it too.
Rob Salinger : I've been with her for ten years. I can't give them up just like that. And it's have your cake and eat it too.
Leo Brody : What do you mean?
Rob Salinger : To have your cake, anyone can do. To eat it and still have some left, that's the trick.
Leo Brody : Eat your cake, have your cake, who cares? You're about to get a plate of sauteed brains thrown into your face, your entire career is the toilet, and you're correcting my grammar?
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Rob Salinger : Come on, Micki, just one child. A small one.
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Rob Salinger : Will you marry me?
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Nurse Mary Verbeck : [telling a spaced out Micki about Rob's infidelity] I have some bad news, Mrs. Salinger. Dr. Fibel and I... how shall I put this. Dr. Fibel and I...
Micki Salinger : It's okay, I know.
Nurse Mary Verbeck : You do?
Micki Salinger : Yes.
Nurse Mary Verbeck : And you don't mind?
Micki Salinger : Why should I mind?
Nurse Mary Verbeck : Frankly, I'm shocked.
Micki Salinger : What am I supposed to do cancel surgery because my doctor's having an affair with his nurse?
Nurse Mary Verbeck : What?
Micki Salinger : [laughing hysterically] You're having an affair with Dr. Fibel.
Nurse Mary Verbeck : What on earth are you talking about? I'm not that kind of woman and neither is Dr. Fibel.
Rob Salinger : [Nurse Verbeck leaves the room in a huff and Rob steps in to find Micki laughing away] Micki, Micki, is everything all right in here?
Micki Salinger : Oh, Rob, did you noticed that Nurse Verbeck is just a little bit menopausal?
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Rob Salinger : [the morning after sleeping with Maude] God, I'm so hungover, my head feels like a tuning fork.
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Rob Salinger : What am I supposed to say? "Micki, a decade is a long time to be intimate with another human being, but I'm..."
Leo Brody : A little stiff. A little stiff, Rob. How about "Dear..."?
Rob Salinger : Dear? What do you mean "dear"? I don't call her "dear", she's a lawyer.
Leo Brody : Oh... "Councilor"? I'm just not good enough for you.
Rob Salinger : Oh! Common, Leo... Jesus! Wait a minute. Uhm... Oh! Common, Leo... Jesus! Wait a minute. Uhm... "Sometimes in a relationship, uhm... Sometimes in a relationship things happen that neither party anticipates."
Leo Brody : Yeah, you've got the punch, now you need the pillow.
Rob Salinger : What do you mean?
Leo Brody : You'll gonna knock her out with this news, you need a pillow for her to land on.
Rob Salinger : Yeah, I suppose...
Leo Brody : "Micki, I love you. I'll always love you."
Rob Salinger : Yeah.
Leo Brody : Uhm... "These years with you, I've seen you blossom from a young girl into a mature woman."
Rob Salinger : No, no, no. I mean, she was always a mature woman, even at 25.
Leo Brody : All right, you like the part "Micki, I love you. I'll always love you", like that, right?
Rob Salinger : Look, Leo. It's all right, but it's not exp...
Leo Brody : Well, "Micki, I love you. I'll always love you..."
Rob Salinger : "And... and... I'm..."
Leo Brody : "... and I've knocked up a girl, I'm gonna marry and I want a divorce."
Rob Salinger : Great, where's the pillow?
Leo Brody : "We'd like to name the baby after you."
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Micki Salinger : [on the way to the doctor's office] Does a sonogram hurt?
Rob Salinger : Only if it's a singing sonogram.
Micki Salinger : [chuckles] Hee hee.
Rob Salinger : [singing] Oh, you're a pregnant mother. You're in the club again. You've got one in the oven, now it's coming down the lane.
Micki Salinger : Oh!
[laughs]