- Intertitle: There are three brands of brothers-in-law - The "Gimmies," the "Let Me Haves", and, the "Do Me A Favor" kind.
- Intertitle: The two most harmless things in the world - A four-year-old boy and a keg of "T.N.T."
- The Girl: [Harold trips on a wagon and falls downstairs] If you must play why don't you go to the den?
- Magnolia: This mah afternoon off. Ah'm goin' to lodge meetin'. Ah'm chairman o' the Anti-Finance Committee.
- Intertitle: Some young men fall in love. Some go crazy from other causes.
- Intertitle: MIDNIGHT! That whispering ghostly hour when the night-watchman snores his loudest.